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Home » HumorApril 2008 » Eleven More Legal Actions the Yankees Should Pursue

Eleven More Legal Actions the Yankees Should Pursue

Besides considering filing suit against construction worker Gino Castignoli for placing a jersey in the foundation of the new Yankee Stadium, which other parties should the Yankees pursue legal action against?

  1. The red-tailed hawk at Fenway for copyright infringement on behalf of Challenger, the American Bald Eagle
  2. Majestic Athletic for manufacturing the offending Ortiz jersey excavated from Yankee Stadium
  3. Norm Abram, host of “The New Yankee Workshop,” for use of the word “Yankee” in a manner misrepresenting the franchise
  4. Mike Kittredge, founder of Yankee Candle, as above
  5. Cease and desist order to the State of Connecticut for the use of the song “Yankee Doodle Dandy” as their official song
  6. The 982 Little League teams using the trademarked nickname “Yankee” without permission
  7. Wilson Sporting Goods, for shoddy manufacture of Robinson Cano’s glove, causing his three errors this season
  8. Elmax Builders Supply Co. for the uneven basepath from home plate to first that caused Derek Jeter’s strained quadricep
  9. Rawlings, for poor construction of the baseballs that caused Philip Hughes to pitch badly on April 13, 2008
  10. George Lucas, for the creation of the “Star Wars” universe, which blatantly portrays aspects of the Steinbrenner family in a disparaging manner
  11. Vatican City, for excessive requirements surrounding the visit of Pope Benedict on April 20, 2008

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