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Home » May 2005 Game CommentsMay 2005 » Designed


Game 26: May 3, 2005
Red Sox (14-12), 5
Tigers (12-13), 3
W: John Halama (1-0)
H: Matt Mantei (3)
H: Mike Timlin (5)
S: Keith Foulke (5)
L: Mike Maroth (2-2)

I have come to the disturbing conclusion that Don Orsillo and I may have been separated at birth. “It looks sort of like a between a giraffe and a tiger. The neck. It’s not really...tigerish,” he said about Paws, the Detroit baseball team’s mascot. Had I been Orsillo’s color guy (gal? chick? sidekick?), I would further comment that the Detroit Paws shares the same name as the Pawtucket Red Sox’s representative polar bear. I might have mentioned that I prefer “Paws” for the bear, since his name forms part of his hometown’s appellation. There are many better names for tigers: Stripes, Roar, Blake, to name a few.

When Doug Mirabelli hit the grand slam in the 5th inning, I briefly pictured Terry Francona in the image of Colonel Hannibal of the A-Team, chomping on a cigar and saying, “I love it when a plan comes together.” Stuntcasting the current group of Red Sox as the A-Team, I imagine:

  • David Ortiz as B.A. Baracus: “I pity the fool that hangs a curveball to me.”
  • Mike Timlin as Howling Mad Murdock: “I don’t wanna be a secret weapon. I wanna be an exposed weapon.”
  • Kevin Millar as Faceman: “Murdock, you’ll always be one of us. Question is which one.”

The Red Sox won, by the way.

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