Empyreal Environs

Not Your Average Joe

Joe Kelly saved his job in Saturday’s game with his six innings of one-run ball. Just as NFL quarterbacks give their offensive linemen Rolexes Kelly should give opulent presents to Hanley Ramirez, David Ortiz, and Mike Napoli. The three sluggers drove in all four runs for the Red Sox in the club’s winning endeavor. Your browser does not support iframes. Ramirez drove in two runs with his first-inning bomb to the batters’ eye. Ortiz drove in Ramirez in the third. Ortiz then scored on Napoli’s single, a grounder that deflected off Marcus Semien to Ben Zobrist. With Jessie Chavez toeing the rubber the Athletics replicated the same paltry production of two runs as the series opener. Just as Oakland mimicked the Red Sox’s facial hair last season this season Chavez sports a similar coiffure to Clay Buchholz and Kelly. Whether to improve his luck or his look Chavez might consider a new haircut. He was 2-3 in the month of May and started June off with a loss. The Red Sox were almost as happy as this Bogaerts fan. He was lucky enough to nab a foul ball off Xander Bogaerts’s bat. Game 57: June 6, 2015 Oakland Athletics23-35 2...

8 June 2015 ∙ 7:28 PM ∙ June 2015 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Athletics ∙ Chavez (Jesse) ∙ Kelly (Joe) ∙ Ortiz ∙ Ramirez (Hanley)

Minnesota Flats

Whatever momentum the Red Sox built up over the weekend evaporated somewhere on the flight between Boston and Minneapolis. Joe Kelly couldn’t get out of the second inning, putting his team seven runs in the hole. Matt Barnes filled in capably by twirling three and one-third innings while surrendering five hits and striking out five. Then again, the Twins hitters weren’t particularly motivated in getting to Barnes given their lead. Ricky Nolasco took advantage of the lead and the Red Sox batters’ impatience with a seven and two-third inning gem. He gave up only two runs while striking out five and walking none. One area where both teams shone was on defense. Dustin Pedroia turned around a flashy play in the first to erase Torii Hunter from the basepaths. In the second inning Aaron Hicks robbed Daniel Nava of a base hit. It was a catch in shallow center that warranted Statcast. Your browser does not support iframes. Hanley Ramirez notched his first RBI of the month in the third inning with a line drive single to right field. Boston’s four-hole hitter didn’t have a run batted in until the 25th of the month. Let that sink in and it...

26 May 2015 ∙ 7:28 PM ∙ May 2015 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Kelly (Joe) ∙ Ramirez (Hanley) ∙ Twins

Kelly Careen

Joe Kelly’s Cy Young campaign is progressing as well as Carly Fiorina’s and Ted Cruz’s presidential campaigns. Fiorina failed to register CarlyFiorina.org and it leads to a page that displays how many people she laid off as CEO of Hewlett Packard with sad face emoticons. Similarly TedCruz.com goes to a page that states “Support President Obama. Immigration Reform Now!” JoeKelly.com is for sale if anyone is interested. You could post his ERA (6.35), ERA+ (65), and FIP (4.49). Despite his high-90s heat he carries a 1-3 record. The starter seemed to be pressing. He threw away a pickoff throw in the first inning that allowed Josh Donaldson to advance to second base. Kelly walked Jose Bautista and Edwin Encarnacion to load the bases. Russell Martin lofted a fly ball to right field to plate Donaldson for the Blue Jays’ first run. Kelly walked Massachusetts native Chris Colabello to start the home half of the second frame. Ryan Goins then flied out to left field and Kelly had an out under his belt. Devon Travis tapped the ball towards Mike Napoli on what should have been a routine ground out but for Kelly getting in Travis’s way. Colabello reached second on...

10 May 2015 ∙ 7:21 PM ∙ May 2015 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Donaldson (Josh) ∙ Kelly (Joe) ∙ Travis (Devon)

Tup of Joe

“Tup” is a rather vulgar word in British English but I don’t think I have readers across the pond. If I did, I don’t think they’d be scandalized by its use. For indeed, Joe Kelly was well and truly tupped in this game. The Rays gained an early lead in the bottom of the first but Kelly contained them until the sixth inning. Kelly surrendered four straight singles and then walked Logan Forsythe with the bases loaded. Craig Breslow tried to stop the bleeding but rather ripped off the bandages (or plasters). Brandon Guyer lined a game-tying single to center, erasing the Red Sox’s four-run advantage. One bright spot was David Ortiz’s fifth-inning blast. The Red Sox icon has amassed 469 home runs and 1,538 RBIs. He surpassed Chipper Jones for 32nd place in home runs and pulled ahead of Joe DiMaggio for 46th in runs batted in. But I’m sure Dustin Pedroia reminded Ortiz that so far this season he has four circuit clouts while the designated hitter only has three. Your browser does not support iframes. It is funny how the game can turn so quickly. I got onto a plane with the score 5-1. Thinking the lead...

24 April 2015 ∙ 5:45 PM ∙ April 2015 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Kelly (Joe) ∙ Ortiz

Kicking Off the Campaign

The country is abuzz about Hillary Clinton’s not so surprising news that she will seek the Democratic nomination for President of the United States. Another player threw his hat into a different ring this weekend: Joe Kelly made the first statement in his case for the Cy Young with a seven-inning gem: one hit, one earned run, two walks, and eight strikeouts. The reigning American League Cy Young title holder, Corey Kluber, lasted six and a third innings against the Tigers with seven hits, two earned runs, a walk, and ten strikeouts. Alex Rodriguez’s candidacy for Gold Glove at first base got off to a rocky start. In the second inning Mike Napoli led off with a grounder to Didi Gregorius, which the Yankees shortstop quickly tossed to Rodriguez for the out. Rodriguez couldn’t come up with the ball. Rodriguez’s hybrid mitt isn’t helping him adapt to this new defensive alignment. Adam Warren induced consecutive ground ball outs to Pablo Sandoval and Allen Craig, but Napoli advanced to third base as a result. Daniel Nava lofted the ball to left field where Brett Gardner should have been ready to put an end to the inning. Gardner took a poor route...

12 April 2015 ∙ 5:45 PM ∙ April 2015 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Holt (Brock) ∙ Kelly (Joe) ∙ Rodriguez (Alex)

Double Digits

Once again the Red Sox routed the opposition. Masahiro Tanaka wasn’t sharp in his second start since his return and the local nine took advantage of that. It feels like the rookies are auditioning for starting roles and veterans are making sure they keep theirs in the waning days of the season. Joe Kelly put the finishing touches on his strong case to be a relied-upon starter in 2015. He had the longest outing of career and notched his sixth win of the season with a strong line, keeping in mind he had a huge lead to work with: 7⅓ innings, 9 hits, 4 earned runs, 2 walks, and 3 strikeouts. The second inning featured 14 plate appearances by Red Sox batters. There were three walks, six singles, and a double. After Boston scored five earnd runs Allen Craig reached on Eury Perez’s misplay and Daniel Nava scored. Tanaka’s stat line was spared the three runs after Perez’s error, but surely the young Yankees center fielder was spoken to by Joe Girardi. Derek Jeter’s sterling presence inspired the Yankees infield even though he didn’t play short. In the fourth inning New York turned a heads-up inning-ending double play. Garin Cecchini...

27 September 2014 ∙ 9:18 PM ∙ September 2014 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Castillo (Rusney) ∙ Cecchini (Garin) ∙ Kelly (Joe)

Bogeyman and Mookie Monster

Xander Bogaerts had a brilliant showing: 4-for-5 with a home run, double, and an RBI single. He outplayed his counterpart at shortstop but for one play. In the fifth inning Joe Kelly suddenly lost command of the strike zone, perhaps because he had to pitch from the stretch. Carlos Beltran led off with a single and Brian McCann took advantage of the shift and bunted his way on. Martin Prado blasted the ball over Yoenis Cespedes’s glove but neither Beltran or McCann scored and Prado ran into the first out. Cespedes unintentionally deked the runners into an improbable tag play. Your browser does not support iframes. Kelly walked eight- and nine-hole hitters, the first bases on balls of the entire evening for the Red Sox hurler. After a visit from Juan Nieves Kelly settled down to induce a line out off Jacoby Ellsbury’s bat to Bogaerts. But then Derek Jeter entered the batter’s box with the bases loaded and knocked one of his patented infield singles to Bogaerts. Jeter was called out by Tim Welke but the replay showed he indeed beat Bogaerts’s throw to first. But it was not an evening where mystique and aura revisited the Bronx. Instead...

3 September 2014 ∙ 6:48 PM ∙ September 2014 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Betts (Mookie) ∙ Bogaerts ∙ Kelly (Joe)

Cat Latos

So we beat this guy. Mat Latos’s cat’s name is Cat Latos. As much as I would like to make fun of this, I did note the rifle on the table in the background. So instead I will say the Red Sox were lucky to have prevailed over Broward County Athletics Association All-Star and 2009 All-Star Futures Game participant Latos. The right-handed starter pitched seven innings and held the Boston batters to a single run with one walk and five strikeouts. Latos was 0-for-2 at the dish but Joe Kelly finagled an opposite-field single off Latos to lead off the third inning. Kelly advanced to second base on Brock Holt’s sacrifice bunt and then swiped third base with Dustin Pedroia batting. It was Kelly’s first steal and the first steal by a Red Sox pitcher since Bill Landis on September 8, 1969 against Cleveland. The last time a Boston pitcher stole third base was Tom Brewer on July 30, 1959, also against the Tribe. His hair, like his baserunning, is a throwback to pitchers past. But Kelly didn’t score in that frame. In fact the Red Sox didn’t get on the board until the seventh inning. Daniel Nava led off...

13 August 2014 ∙ 6:12 PM ∙ August 2014 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cespedes (Yoenis) ∙ history ∙ Kelly (Joe)

Forever Friends

Best friends Jim Kelly and Shelby Miller opposed each other on the mound last night. As buddies are wont to do they had a wager about who could get a hit off the other. Perhaps Kelly was playing some mind games when he allowed Miller to walk on four pitches with two out in the second inning. In the third inning Kelly sent a bounding ball past Miller into Jhonny Peralta’s glove. Peralta’s throw reached Mike Adams almost simultaneously as Kelly’s foot touched the sack. Gary Cederstrom called Kelly out but the replay showed that Kelly had indeed managed a hit off his best friend. The bet was a hundred doll hairs, not a hundred dollars, Kelly quipped. Your browser does not support iframes. Almost as rare as a pitcher getting a hit is an umpire calling a runner out for running inside the first base line. This happened to Oscar Taveras in the fourth inning and the incident had Mike Matheny out of the dugout to argue. I’ve seen far more flagrant violations that weren’t called so I don’t blame Matheny for disputing Cederstrom’s judgment. Allen Craig injured himself trying to beat out a ball to first in his...

7 August 2014 ∙ 7:56 PM ∙ August 2014 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Kelly (Joe) ∙ Miller (Shelby) ∙ umpires

Team Building

If Yoenis Cespedes will be playing left field longterm someone needs to sit down with him and show him where Manny Ramirez and Jonny Gomes positioned themselves. Ramirez might have played a bit too shallow; Cespedes could probably cheat closer to the wall with his superior fielding speed. But if he sets up in right field, which would showcase his cannon arm, he’d need a workshop with Shane Victorino. Victorino would have to figure out if he would undergo season-ending back surgery, however, before rejoining the team. Cespedes lined a single to left field in his first at bat as a Red Sox player. In the fifth inning he came up with one down, two men on base, and the score 5-3 in the Yankees’ favor. A home run would have put his new team ahead but Cespedes flied out to Jacoby Ellsbury. Joe Kelly found out about being sent to Boston along with Allen Craig for John Lackey via Twitter. Kelly had been chatting with A.J. Pierzynski about it; I guess the catcher isn’t ignoring his teammates and looking at his phone in the clubhouse now that he’s on a contending team. Speaking of Pierzynski, this game lasted four...

3 August 2014 ∙ 6:24 PM ∙ August 2014 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cespedes (Yoenis) ∙ Drew (Stephen) ∙ Jeter (Derek) ∙ Kelly (Joe) ∙ Vazquez (Christian)