Empyreal Environs

Fateful CaraCole

Sometimes it’s just not your day. Cole Hamels had a bandage on his chin, perhaps from his morning shave or maybe he tussled with a particularly aggressive pimple. Things seemed to turn around when he effortlessly snared Marco Scutaro’s comebacker for the first out of the third. But in the next inning a hot shot off Adrian Gonzalez’s knocked off Hamels’s glove and then knocked the Phillies’ starter off the mound. With Hamels out of the game getting his hand x-rayed the Red Sox made hay. Long reliever David Herndon gave up a triple to Josh Reddick with one down in the fifth and the replacement outfielder scored easily on Drew Sutton’s ground ball single to right. Scutaro singled and advanced Sutton to third. With runners at the corners and one out Jon Lester didn’t pull a John Lackey in the batter’s box but neither did he strike out. The lineup turned over to Jacoby Ellsbury, who sent a wormburner to the opposite field to plate Sutton. Jason Varitek clouted home runs in the sixth and eighth, but since Dustin Pedroia also hit a four-bagger it was the second baseman’s hit that was most people heard about. Particularly because it...

30 June 2011 ∙ 10:20 PM ∙ June 2011 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cameron (Mike) ∙ Hamels (Cole) ∙ Lester (Jon) ∙ Phillies ∙ Varitek

CC Oh Enemy

I imagine most male readers won’t be familiar with the hand-clapping songs that girls like me played while we waited in line for lunch or to pass the time while riding the bus to school. There were two flavors of “See See Oh ———” songs, one for playmates and one for enemies. When I think of CC Sabathia I always think of the latter. See see oh enemyCome out and fight with meAnd bring your weapons threeClimb up my poison treeSlide down my razor bladeAnd through my dungeon doorAnd we’ll be enemiesFor ever more more shut-the-dungeon-door Another version:Say say old enemyCome out and fight with meAnd bring your BB gunAnd we’ll have lots of funI’ll scratch your eyes outAnd make you bleed to deathAnd we’ll be jolly enemiesForever evermore Such is training for grade school girls to become cruel teenagers. I picture Henrik and Daniel Sedin singing these chants while they sit cross-legged across from each other, a odd mirror of floppery. The three-hour, 27-minute rain delay didn’t entirely dampen the Bronx fan base. Yankee fans were tantalized by Curtis Granderson’s two-run bomb in the first inning. A surprising number stayed until the seventh inning instead of leaving early with...

10 June 2011 ∙ 8:08 PM ∙ June 2011 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cameron (Mike) ∙ Ortiz ∙ Sabathia (C.C.)

Oliver Twisting

Andrew Oliver didn’t seem like he would get out of the first inning. Jacoby Ellsbury roped a double at his counterpart in center and swiped third base as Oliver couldn’t get his fastball over the dish. Dustin Pedroia walked on five pitches and took advantage of Oliver’s unease by stealing second. Adrian Gonzalez protected the plate until Oliver sent a pitch that got enough of plate for him to loft into the outfield for a sacrifice fly. Despite his lack of command Oliver got ahead of the count against Kevin Youkilis, notching two straight strikes, one called and one swinging, to begin the at bat. Youkilis waited the pitcher’s sudden competence out and the count evened to 2-2. On the fifth pitch Youkilis increased his franchise-leading hit by pitch mark to 74. With a greenhorn on the mound Terry Francona put on the double steal for Pedroia and Youkilis, not his speediest pair of baserunners despite what Pedroia might say. But with Oliver on the ropes Jed Lowrie and Carl Crawford helped him out by popping out to the infield. While the first inning was a slow evisceration of the Tigers’ pitching and defense Mike Cameron ripped the bandage off...

30 May 2011 ∙ 12:28 PM ∙ May 2011 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Buchholz (Clay) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Oliver (Andrew) ∙ Ortiz ∙ Papelbon (Jonathan) ∙ Youkilis

Cameron’s Latest Epic

Unlike James Cameron, Mike Cameron didn’t need $2.9 million in cameras to create breathtaking action scenes. The outfielder’s first home run curved around Pesky’s Pole in the second inning to halve the visitors’ lead. His second homer was a blast into the Monster seats to lead off the fourth inning. The two circuit clouts sandwiched a two-run inning sparked by Adrian Gonzalez’s ground ball single up the middle. Jacoby Ellsbury easily advanced from first to third on the grounder. It was the only time the pair were on the basepaths together, breaking their four-game doubles streak. Kevin Youkilis’s sharply diving liner to left fooled Milton Bradley and plated Ellsbury for the game-tying run. David Ortiz followed with a skipping single through the shift to drive in Youkilis. With the culinary expertise of Tony Bourdain and the trenchant wit of Dorothy Parker, Heidi Watney continued her gastronomic journey through the concession stands of ballparks across the country. She tasted two sandwich offerings, Fenway’s Turkey Gobbler and the Monster Roast Beef. “Mmm,” she keenly observed. “I like the gobbler because it’s like Thanksgiving in one bite.” Fans can vote for their favorite; the winning sandwich will remain on the menu for the...

30 April 2011 ∙ 1:33 PM ∙ April 2011 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cameron (Mike) ∙ Jenks (Bobby) ∙ Matsuzaka

Jim Rice’s Magical Snuggie

In contrast to another one of Don Orsillo’s staid ties (black grid punctuated with light gray rectangles), Jim Rice covered himself in a garish but ultimately lucky Snuggie (marketed as the Comfy Throw and available for $24.99 at the official online shop). Spurred on by the tremendous spirit embodied in Rice’s blanket, “Dirty Water” echoed through Fenway Park for just the third time this season. Jed Lowrie leading off and going 3-for-5 with his first home run of 2011 might have something to do with it. Josh Beckett’s 7 commanding innings with 3 hits, 1 earned run, 2 walks, and 9 whiffs figured into the mix. Shutdown appearances by Daniel Bard and Jonathan Papelbon in support of their starter didn’t hurt, and neither did solid defensive play by Dustin Pedroia, Adrian Gonzalez, and Mike Cameron. Cameron ended the game by gloving a fly ball off the bat of Travis Snider while sliding perilously close to the left field stands. A misplay by Cameron would have allowed Aaron Hill, who advanced twice on defensive indifference, to score and potentially spark a rally. Cameron has adjusted well to his role as a platoon player and will hopefully mentor Carl Crawford as the...

17 April 2011 ∙ 11:01 AM ∙ April 2011 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Beckett (Josh) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Lowrie (Jed) ∙ Orsillo ∙ Rice (Jim)

Dazzler in the Downpour

The day may have been a murky day marred by two rain delays but Clay Buchholz’s supreme skill outshone the showers. “Buch-nasty” (as he was dubbed by Mike Cameron) pitched only six innings but that was with a 1 hour, 44 minute delay of first pitch and a 59-minute rain delay called in the top of the third. While he allowed five hits and three bases on balls he struck out seven and didn’t allow any extra base hits. Both relievers, Daniel Bard and Felix Doubront, also stifled the Blue Jays batters, allowing just three baserunners between them. Jose Molina represented the final out of the game but was hit by a pitch with the count 0-2. The Blue Jays catcher seemed to want to make something of it, but if he thinks anyone let alone a rookie would intentionally plunk him in such a situation he needs to book some time with a therapist to discuss his persecution complex. It’s not like the name “Overbay” was on the back of his jersey. Replacing Jacoby Ellsbury in the speed department was David Ortiz. The fleet-footed designated hitter sprinted around the horn while Vernon Wells and Fred Lewis chased after the...

23 August 2010 ∙ 5:30 PM ∙ August 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Blue Jays ∙ Buchholz (Clay) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Hall (Bill) ∙ Ortiz

str8edgeracer Tweets Triumphantly

Motoring to Motor City next. Will work on the novel on the way there--feeling inspired after winning the Beantown series. 1 day, 6 hours ago Cameron knocked a dinger off Neftali but the rookie blew away the rest of the batters. Unbelievable heat! 1 day, 6 hours ago Again with the Nava kid, this time I walked him with two outs. Now it’s up to the bullpen 1 day, 5 hours ago Whew, got Beltre to strikeout with two runners on and two out. 1 day, 6 hours ago @ErinAndrews I walked that guy who has a crush on you, same one who hit a grand slam on the first MLB pitch he saw, but got out of it. 1 day, 6 hours ago Double steal by my boys in the fifth! Borbon and Andrus are like DEER. 1 day, 7 hours ago Got some runs to work with thanks to Cruz. Managed to get Youkilis out--he should have gone to the All-Star game. 1 day, 7 hours ago Getting into a groove--struck out the side in the third. 1 day, 8 hours ago Rough going in the 2nd--Beltre has always killed me. Hope he goes back to the NL...

19 July 2010 ∙ 7:12 PM ∙ July 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Beltre (Adrian) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Feliz (Neftali) ∙ Rangers ∙ Wilson (C.J.)

John Lacking

For all the complaints about Daisuke Matsuzaka’s starts, his teammate John Lackey’s performances can be as exasperating. This past offseason’s key free agent acquisition lasted 4⅔ innings with a line of 8 hits, 7 earned runs, 6 walks, and 2 strikeouts. Lackey had so little command of the strike zone that he couldn’t even take advantage of home plate umpire Jeff Kellogg’s favorable strike zone. Had the Red Sox saved some offensive firepower from the first game Lackey could have secured his 10th win of the season, but Cito Gaston’s relief corps shut down the Boston batters for five innings. The relievers may have been aided by Kellogg’s calls. Kellogg inspired the ire of many of the visiting hitters. Seven times the Red Sox batters were called out on strikes. As the strike zone seemed to be favoring pitchers, hitters found themselves swinging at questionable pitches, resulting in five swinging strikeouts. Mike Cameron was ejected in the seventh inning for complaining to Kellogg, prompting Terry Francona to confront Kellogg. Seconds after Kellogg motioned that Francona was getting tossed the Red Sox skipper copied the motion, Carlos Zambrano-like, which proved to be one of the few enjoyable moments in the game....

11 July 2010 ∙ 8:22 AM ∙ July 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Bautista (Jose) ∙ Blue Jays ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ ejections ∙ Francona (Terry) ∙ Lackey (John) ∙ Nava (Daniel)

Be Like Mike

Just a few days after the Red Sox signed John Lackey, news broke that the team contracted with Mike Cameron for two years of his services. The Jason Bay Era in Boston was officially over and the emphasis on offense shifted to defense. Around the same time the Yankees completed a three-way trade for Curtis Granderson, a much more dramatic acquisition. Both Cameron and Granderson have been shelved for parts of this season but as expected the latter has had a greater impact on his team. Most of Granderson’s at bats have come in the bottom third of the lineup, a batting order with formidable bats at every position. The Yankee center fielder has 7 homers and 22 runs batted in over 173 at bats while Cameron clouted his first homer in this game with 8 RBIs in 94 at bats. Cameron’s three-run blast in the second with two men on added to Darnell McDonald’s first inning solo shot to put the visitors ahead 4-0. Such a lead would be easy for Clay Buchholz to maintain. Buchholz’s athleticism worked against him. He singled in the bottom of the first, his first major league hit. When he tried to run out...

27 June 2010 ∙ 9:06 AM ∙ June 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Bard (Daniel) ∙ Buchholz (Clay) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Giants ∙ Lackey (John)

Rocky Mountain Slight

Dustin Pedroia looked for the security guard that denied him entrance to Coors Field during the 2007 World Series but couldn’t find him. Unfortunately, the Red Sox second baseman also couldn’t find his laser gun: he went 0-for-2 with two walks and a strikeout. Jhoulys Chacin pitched as if he were teammate Ubaldo Jimenez, shutting out Boston’s hot lineup for 6⅔ innings to the tune of 4 hits, 5 walks, and 5 strikeouts. The Red Sox had a chance to score in the third with Mike Cameron’s leadoff single but the center fielder was caught stealing. After Cameron’s wasted out Josh Reddick singled, Jon Lester sac bunted, and Marco Scutaro and Pedroia got free passes. The Rockies nearly squandered their scoring chance in the fifth. Chris Nelson singled (his first major league hit) and Clint Barmes walked but Chacin struck out on three bunt attempts. Lester induced a fly out to right for the second out and all he had to do was face the slumping Todd Helton for the final out. Helton is a shadow of his former self but managed to line the ball to Reddick for a run. Ryan Spilborghs returned the favor in the bottom of...

23 June 2010 ∙ 5:32 AM ∙ June 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Cameron (Mike) ∙ Lester (Jon) ∙ Lowell (Mike) ∙ Pedroia ∙ Rockies

Defense is Difference

I’m no sabermetrician but I developed a few formulae that summarize last night’s game. 6 (Total Tampa Bay runs) - 4 (unearned runs) Marco Scutaro (first inning at bat) - bat = Happy kid in the stands Mike Cameron one-out double (third inning) + Ben Zobrist (catch of Jeremy Hermida’s fly ball to right) ≠ Redemption Victor Martinez (leadoff single in the fourth) + David Ortiz (double off the left field wall) = 0 runs James Shields + 121 pitches + third start of the season + Joe Maddon = Dusty Baker 7th inning rally (Dustin Pedroia two-run HR + Kevin Youkilis solo HR) 39 degrees + 37,022 fans + rain + loss ≠ “Dirty Water”Game 11: April 17, 2010Rays 8-36W: James Shields (1-0) H: Randy Choate (1) H: Dan Wheeler (2) S: Rafael Soriano (4)2B: Pat Burrell (1), John Jaso – 2 (2) HR: Evan Longoria (3)Red Sox 4-75L: Clay Buchholz (1-1)2B: Mike Cameron (2), David Ortiz (5), Dustin Pedroia (4) HR: Dustin Pedroia (5), Marco Scutaro (1), Kevin Youkilis (2)...

18 April 2010 ∙ 11:33 AM ∙ April 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Buchholz (Clay) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Pedroia ∙ Rays ∙ Youkilis

Screw ’Em!

The best performance in the opening game by a Josh wasn’t turned in by Beckett but rather came from a five-year old boy flown up from Tennessee named Josh Sacco. Sacco’s recreation of Herb Brooks’s speech to the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team is a YouTube sensation. He was even summoned to Vancouver to fire up the 2010 men’s team before its final match against the Canadians. The Red Sox cottoned to Sacco’s exhortations better than the hockey players did, coming back twice to defeat the Yankees in their home opener at Fenway. With unbridled gusto Sacco bellowed into the microphone, “I’m sick and tired hearing about what a great baseball team the Yankees have!” For five innings they were nauseatingly great: C.C. Sabathia kept the scoring to two runs, Jorge Posada and Curtis Granderson (in his first at bat as a Yankee) blasted back-to-back homers in the second, and Brett Gardner and Derek Jeter justified their slap-hitting tactics with RBI singles in the fourth. The Bronx Bromides didn’t look so great in the seventh. Perhaps they were distressed by the sight of Steven Tyler’s reanimated cadaver wailing a tune that somewhat resembled “God Bless America.” Or maybe they were...

4 April 2010 ∙ 11:55 PM ∙ April 2010 Game Comments ∙ Comments: 0
Tags: Beltre (Adrian) ∙ Cameron (Mike) ∙ Pedroia ∙ Sacco (Josh) ∙ Schoeneweis (Scott) ∙ Scutaro (Marco) ∙ Yankees