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Entries from Empyreal Environs tagged with “Barton (Daric)”

Bradenia is Now Beckettburg

King Dallas I of Bradenia was dethroned by upstart Josh Beckett the Usurper. While the ouster was hardly impressive (6 innings pitched, 3 earned runs, 5 walks, and 7 strikeouts) it prevented the Red Sox from being swept by a team whose record hovers around .500. Aiding Beckett in the expropriation was J.D. Drew and Ryan Kalish with two runs batted in apiece. Drew’s sixth inning double brought the encroachers within a run. Not only did Drew’s extra base hit help spark the rebellion but also made up for him getting thrown out at first to end the fourth inning when he casually back-peddled to the bag after making a banana turn. Fireballer Henry Rodriguez couldn’t blow away Kalish, who pinch hit for Bill Hall and lofted the ball deep enough to left so that Mike Lowell could score from third. Drew charged around the bases with a purpose and scored the go-ahead head run on Kalish’s single. Home plate Hunter Wendelstedt ejected Daric Barton, after calling the Oakland first baseman out on strikes for the final out of the game. The gesture was as useless as the appendix, a vestigial organ that can only uselessly inhabit the gut or...


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